32: Not to turn a city to idolatry

The Book of Knowledge
Laws of Idolatry and Paganism
Not to turn a city to idolatry (Ex. 23:13)

            the PRIEST and the KING in conversation

PRIEST
it isn’t wise

KING
don’t care about wise

PRIEST
you should you’re the king

KING
got people to be wise for me

PRIEST
you kick a rock and then whoops a mudslide
do you see what i mean?

KING
no

PRIEST
actions have consequences

KING
            parroting
actions have consequences

PRIEST
precisely

KING
you said it not me

PRIEST
sire

KING
            mimicking
sire sire sire
GOD
pick a new title

PRIEST
it’s
…
your title you can pick what you like

KING
don’t you ever get tired of being the only grown-up in the room?

PRIEST
yes constantly

KING
i’m bored of our God
my God is better

PRIEST
a cat with lasers for eyes

KING
way better

PRIEST
we can’t

KING
he’s adorable

PRIEST
i’m sure he is

KING
big old lasers that go pew pew

PRIEST
sire-

KING
Gods need wow factor
my laser-eyed cat
that’s wow factor

PRIEST
we cannot just change the God of this city
there are temples there are traditions

KING
you’ll be the head of this new religion
            beat
if you’d like
            beat
Chief Cat Priest in Charge
or whatever you want to be called

            beat

PRIEST
we’ll need to erect a shrine

KING
yes

PRIEST
in the center of town to communicate the centrality of-

KING
yes yes

PRIEST
we’ll make the shrine from gold and use emeralds for it’s eyes

KING
with lasers

PRIEST
with lasers
yes sire

KING
your meow-jesty
if you please

            long silence

PRIEST
            through gritted teeth
your meow-jesty

KING
excellent
go
start a new religion

            END OF PLAY