65: Not to consult the ov
The Book of Knowledge
Laws of Idolatry and Paganism
Not to consult the ov (Deut. 18:11)
“…among the deeds associated with an ov is taking the skull of a corpse, offering incense, and chanting incantations until one hears a voice in a very low tone emanating from one’s armpits and replying to one’s questions.” – Avodat Kochavim 6:1
CW: sexual content and language
1
a BEAR and a TWINK in a bedroom
both nude
the BEAR has his left arm raised
the TWINK has his ear pressed to the BEAR’s armpit
BEAR
can you hear it?
TWINK
not yet
TWINK listens
BEAR
i can
TWINK listens
TWINK
what is she saying?
silence
BEAR
“i forgive you”
TWINK listens
TWINK
that doesn’t sound like my mom
BEAR
it’s what she’s saying
TWINK
you can hear her?
BEAR
yes
TWINK listens
TWINK
wow
TWINK listens
i miss you mom
TWINK listens
you’re like magic
BEAR
just my armpit
TWINK
both or-
BEAR
just the left one
TWINK listens
TWINK
i can’t hear her
TWINK listens
what a weird gift
2
the TWINK is gone
in his place is a LEATHER PUP
also nude
the LEATHER PUP has his ear up against the BEAR’s armpit
LEATHER PUP
i don’t normally believe in stuff like this, like witches and sorcerers and fortune tellers, i’m not even superstitious, “step on a crack break your mother’s back,” i risk my mother’s back constantly the way i conduct myself, i go under ladders with black cats, i take the Lord’s name in vain in church, i don’t believe in ghosts, you wanna talk astrology? no thanks, prayer is just mumbling to yourself, the Loch Ness monster isn’t real, aliens didn’t build Atlantis, Bigfoot didn’t do 9/11, Tarot makes my skin crawl, so i am not what you’d call a believer
BEAR
then why are you listening?
LEATHER PUP
i’m not
he sniffs the armpit
tries a bit too hard to be horny
the scent
makes me feral
mmmm fuck yeah unfff yeah daddy fuck aww yeah
BEAR
suck me off?
LEATHER PUP
umm in a minute
just
puts his ear back to the armpit
i thought i heard
my brother
…
he died when we were kids
BEAR
i know
i heard
LEATHER PUP
you heard?
BEAR
from here
pointing to his armpit
he told me
LEATHER PUP
fuck
…
that is so fucking hot
3
the LEATHER PUP is gone
in his place is a MUSCLE HIMBO
also nude
but not listening to the armpit
BEAR
try it
MUSCLE HIMBO
uhhhhh
silence
BEAR
listen
MUSCLE HIMBO
i’ll sniff it
if that’s what you’re into
you want that?
i can do musk
BEAR
that’s not what this is about
MUSCLE HIMBO
it’s about…
BEAR
she has a message
MUSCLE HIMBO
girl
…
c’mon
BEAR
she needs to tell you something important
listen just listen please
silence
MUSCLE HIMBO
on second thought i can jerk myself off at home
4
the BEAR alone
doing his best to press his own ear to his armpit
he listens closely
BEAR
i know i’m sorry
i tried
…
don’t cry please
…
maybe he’ll come back
…
i know i know
…
he loves you too
i’m certain
…
all right then
the BEAR lowers his arm
takes a moment to compose himself
then pulls out his phone
he types a message
reciting it aloud as he types
BEAR
“sup”
“you like pits?”
“mine are crazy”
END OF PLAY