75: To repent and confess wrongdoings (Part 1 of 2)
The Book of Knowledge
Laws of Repentance
To repent and confess wrongdoings (Num 5:7)
THE BOOK OF KNOWLEDGE
Endnotes & Corrections
1: To know there is a God (Ex. 20:2)
For further research, please consult The History of Nineteenth-Century Occultist Samuel Ludlum, which is not available in any library real or imagined at this time but certainly should be.
2: Not to entertain thoughts of other gods besides Him (Ex. 20:3)
Space travel as depicted in this play may or may not conform to known scientific principles. I do not understand space travel. The cosmos are a wonder I cannot comprehend.
3: To know that He is one (Deut. 6:4)
“Above [the Lord] stood the seraphims: each one had six wings; with twain he covered his face, and with twain he covered his feet, and with twain he did fly. And one cried unto another, and said, Holy, holy, holy, is the Lord of hosts: the whole earth is full of his glory.” (Isaiah 6:2-3)
4: To love Him (Deut. 6:5)
“Durme, durme” is a traditional Ladino lullaby. Please see the recording by singer Dina for reference.
5: To fear Him (Deut. 10:20)
Whatever I conjured in this play has been following me for months. It won’t let me go. It’s in my kitchen cabinets, my keyholes, under the bone. Can you help? It’s still behind you.
6: To sanctify His Name (Lev. 22:32)
I wrote this one while lightly stoned.
7: Not to profane His Name (Lev. 22:32)
I wrote this one while heavily stoned.
8: Not to destroy objects associated with His Name (Deut. 12:4)
My full understanding of astronomy is entirely derived from the Indigo Girl’s song “Galileo.” Any factual inconsistencies in this play are the Indigo Girls’ fault.
9: To listen to the prophet speaking in His Name (Deut. 18:15)
I tried really hard not to make every play about Tr*mp, but this play is definitely about Tr*mp.
10: Not to test the prophet unduly (Deut. 6:16)
I am a prophet. Do not test me.
11: To emulate His ways (Deut. 28:9)
For further information on how to care for roses, please consult Martha Stewart.
12: To cleave to those who know Him (Deut. 10:20)
“This won't be the first time/I've stayed behind to face/The bitter consequences/Of an ancient fall from grace/I'm a daughter of the race of Cain” – Stephen Schwartz, “Stranger to the Rain"
13: To love Jews (Lev. 19:18)
#NotAllChristians
14: To love converts (Deut. 10:19)
Please see the 1994 animated film Thumbelina for further information on fairies.
15: Not to hate fellow Jews (Lev. 19:17)
Do not let antisemites see this play, I do not need to provide them a new mascot with this fucking Jack-in-the-Box. This is a concern I have with a few of these plays actually. My therapist and I are working on it.
16: To reprove (Lev. 19:17)
This commandment is too short.
17: Not to embarrass others (Lev. 19:17)
For more information on cryptocurrency, please don’t ask me, I have no clue. You can ask my friend Ilana. She is writing her dissertation on NFTs, which means she knows what words like “blockchain” mean.
18: Not to oppress the weak (Ex. 21:22)
If you or a loved one are an elected official and you have murdered someone, I recommend seeking out the crisis management firm Olivia Pope & Associates (OPA).
19: Not to speak derogatorily of others (Lev. 19:16)
This play is not intended to be read by anyone I am related to by blood or by marriage. Buyer beware.
20: Not to take revenge (Lev. 19:18)
Ok, but like, it just feels a liiiiittle rich for God to tell us not to take revenge because, hello, talk about a lover of revenge…
21: Not to bear a grudge (Lev. 19:18)
A common misconception in psychoanalysis is that a zombie cannot gaslight you. This is gaslighting.
22: To learn Torah (Deut. 6:7)
If you love someone deeply enough, you should fear studying them. The true lover knows they can never truly know their beloved. This play is not about my marriage.
23: To honor those who teach and know Torah (Lev. 19:32)
This play is not about my parents, but it’s not not about my parents, but it’s really about all of our parents, including yours, but not your parents specifically, unless maybe I’m wrong, but really “parent” is more of a mythopoetic role being invoked here, but also I definitely was thinking about my flesh-and-blood parents, and yours. This play is dedicated to Meryl Streep.
24: Not to inquire into idolatry (Lev. 19:4)
I did not know who Muhsin Hendricks was until I saw that he died a few days before writing this play. As a gay man, I was shaken when I read of his death, and I am shaken when I think of it now. This world finds dead queer people easier to understand than living queer people. Including, I suppose, myself.
25: Not to follow the whims of your heart or what your eyes see (Num. 15:39)
I originally wrote this play in a grad school class in 2018. I didn’t have the time to write a play this day. So, this may technically be plagiarism (of myself).
26: Not to blaspheme (Ex. 22:27)
I forgot I wrote this play.
27: Not to worship idols in the manner they are worshiped (Ex. 20:5)
I have never read Wittgenstein. Don’t tell anyone.
28: Not to worship idols in the four ways we worship God (Ex. 20:5)
Would it blow your mind if I told you that the NRA sponsored this play?
29: Not to make an idol for yourself (Ex. 20:4)
In 2018, I wrote a play for middle schoolers called The Golem of California. The play I wrote for mitzvot 29 is not that play, but it’s not not that play.
30: Not to make an idol for others (Lev. 19:4)
Humiliatingly, I am pretty sure this play was inspired by an arc on the teen soap Riverdale about an organ-harvesting cult called the Farm being investigated by Betty and Jughead of Archie Comics fame. For more information on the Farm, or any Riverdale plot points, please text me.
31: Not to make human forms even for decorative purposes (Ex. 20:20)
M3GAN 2.0 is in theatres June 27.
32: Not to turn a city to idolatry (Ex. 23:13)
My cats made me write this play under threat of violence.
33: To burn a city that has turned to idol worship (Deut. 13:17)
When I was a child, the dolls in my dollhouse came to life and destroyed our home. I killed all of the evil dolls in a fire. I’m pretty sure I killed them all. There’s no way one of them survived, right?
34: Not to rebuild it as a city (Deut. 13:17)
“You are in my heart,/There is no other who knows you,/Only your son, [Akhenaten],/Whom you have taught your ways and your might…(And) the great Queen whom he loves, the Lady of the Two Lands,/Nefer-nefru-Aten Nefertiti, living forever.” – “The Great Hymn to the Aten” as translated by Miriam Lichtheim
35: Not to derive benefit from it (Deut. 13:18)
This play was inspired by the far-right German politician Alice Weidel. She is a leader in the Alternative for Germany (AfD) party, which espouses virulent anti-immigrant and anti-LGBT policies. Alice Weidel is in a same-sex marriage with a woman from Sri Lanka. Alice Weidel is not a good person.
36: Not to missionize an individual to idol worship (Deut. 13:12)
This play was inspired by a recurring nightmare I have. Don’t ask which one. You know which one. You’re there every time I fall asleep.
37: Not to love the missionary (Deut. 13:9)
#NotAllChristians again, but for real this time. I sincerely hope that these plays do not imply that I have contempt for all Christian believers and thinkers. As an antidote to this, please watch this sermon by my dear friend, Reverend Sarah Lusche, on Ecclesiates 3:1-8.
TO BE CONTINUED...