84: To have tzitzit on four-cornered garments

The Book of Love of God
Laws of Tzitzit
To have tzitzit on four-cornered garments (Num 15:38)

Recipe for Today’s Play

The purpose of the tzitzit is to remind the wearer of all 613 commandments in the Torah. For Rashi, this was done numerologically. The word tzitzit adds up to 600 in gematria, there are 8 threads with 5 sets of knots. 600 + 8 + 5 = 613.

Today, we will create our own homemade tzitzit.

1.     First, gather every character and set piece and props from the 83 plays that preceded today’s play. Place them to the side.

2.     Next, conjure in your mind’s eye every character and set piece and prop that might appear in the next 529 plays after today. As I haven’t written them yet, we’ll want to air on the side of having too many options rather than not enough.

3.     Place every character both written and yet to be written onstage side-by-side.

4.     Remove any redundant characters (i.e. if there are multiple YOUNG WOMEN or RABBIS or what have you, we only need one of each).

5.     Even with redundancies removed, we’ll need to reduce our dramatis personae to 600. Begin braiding the characters’ souls together. Continue braiding until you are left with 600 entwined fictional souls spread across the stage.

6.     Place every set piece both written and yet to be written onstage.

7.     Have a mystic come onstage and place their hands on each set piece.

8.     Once the mystic has completed this work, ask them which of the 8 set pieces are most spiritually sound. Save these 8 set pieces and discard the rest.

9.     Place every prop both written and yet to be written onstage.

10.  The Almighty will be hiding in 5 of these props. Search every prop until you find the 5 that contain the divine. Discard the rest.

11.  You now have 600 braided souls, 8 mystic-approved set pieces, and 5 props containing the Almighty. 600 + 8 + 5 = 613. But we’re not done yet.

12.  Invite every single human being on the planet to the theatre. They do not all need to come, but they must all be invited, and there must be space for all of them. Allow additional time for travel.

13.  Once your audience is assembled, perform every play written and yet to be written. Where there are missing characters or set pieces or props, God will fill in the gaps.

14.  Next, every audience member in attendance writes their own 613 plays responding to the 613 mitzvot. Don’t rush them through this process, it may take years.

15.  Once they have written these plays, every audience member repeats the steps above to create their own tzitzit.

16.  Continue this process until the end of time, until the clocks stop, until our souls fade from memory, until God fades from memory, until all we have made here today and will make afterward vanishes forever.